Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Hard Worker

3 year old - "My daddy is such a hard worker. He works so hard."

Me - "Well, what about me?  Do I work hard?"

3 yo - "No mommy, you don't work hard....you just do everything."

This was the most insulting compliment I've received to date and I once had someone tell me I was pretty in an average sort of way. 

Monday, February 16, 2015

The Good and the Bad

Staying at home with the kids is a delicate balancing act of recognizing the good and not beating myself up for admitting there is bad.

The Good: I got to snuggle with my toddler at 6:30am and watch cartoons instead of rushing around to get ready and get out the door.

The Bad: I have been up since 3am since the baby is teething/has a cold/hates me and wanted to hang out for an hour or 2 in the middle of the night.  Since I get to be the one who stays home, I get to be the one who gets up with the kids.  It is more acceptable for me to fall asleep with my eyes open at home, than my husband to pass out at work and get fired.

The Good:  I don't have to change out of my pajamas.

The Bad:  There are many days I do not talk to another adult.  If this is the case I pounce on poor Matt once he gets home and either a.) throw the kids at him and run out the door....only to drive around and enjoy the quiet, still not talking to anyone; or b.) pounce on poor Matt and start firing questions at him about his social interactions.  Questions that have actually been asked include: what did you eat from lunch?  Did you get to go to the bathroom alone?

The Bad Part 2:  Pants that grow with you give the illusion of zero weight gain even though you may have hid in the pantry and ate your kids Christmas candy.

The Good:  You never miss a moment.  Those first steps, first words, hugs and kisses.

The Bad:  You never miss a moment.  Not a single tantrum, poop explosion, I hate my brother & like to yell in his face every 3 minutes moment.

The Good:  Plenty of time for play dates.

The Bad:  It could be my introvert nature, or the fact that making mom friends is harder than finding a husband was, but none of my friend stay home (most think I'm pretty bonkers for staying home myself) and I have yet to ask another mom on a date.  Play dates are going to the library and pretending we know the other people there.

The Good: You get to make all of the decisions....what your child eats, learns, can and cannot do.

The Bad: For the love of God do not put any of these choices on Facebook, they will be judged and ridiculed and commented on because you get to stay home so you should have home cooked organic meals every night, after you have done your craft and learning activity, while staying on a consistent schedule because....you know, you can since you're home all the time.  A 3 year old acts like a 3 year old no matter what setting.  Today our learning activity is in the form of Elmo...on TV.

It is heavy to be responsible for all of these things.  I am sure I'm failing everyday in at least one aspect.  But donut date Fridays, even if they happen at lunch time and not breakfast, are the bees knees even if they are not healthy.

The Good:  We have more family time to just be together and not getting chores/errands done.

The Bad: We don't have to use family time to do chores/errands because I did them.  Probably at 4am after the baby went back to sleep.  I may be burning a hole in my stomach with all this coffee in my system.  Truth, I hate 90% of the housework, but it's part of my job, just like I'm sure Matt hates 90% of the reports he has to do, or questions he has to answer.

There are so many more good and bads.  Sometimes when I'm overwhelmed and consider taking any job that is offered to me just to get out of the house, I stop Matt and tell him all the positives of working and make him point out all of the positives of staying home.  Sometimes it is hard to see the forest in the trees, or the awesome opportunity I have to stay home through the pile of laundry and dirty diapers.  It works for us and although I'll question what the hell I'm doing and then search through the want ads during the week, I can't imagine being anywhere else.

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Mean Mommy

3 year old: "Mommy, those are mean alligators, like you."

Me: "Wait, what (I was only half listening to the previous 10 minutes where he gave the life and adventures of said alligators & pirates)?  I'm not mean."

3 yo: "Yes you are mommy, but only a little bit, like the alligators."

He runs off as I contemplate if this is a score in the good mom or bad mom column?  I choose to pat myself on the back for a job well done. Looks like I'm winning some of these battles.

My meanest act of the day had been not letting him eat a "cold treat" for breakfast. It was a good negotiation tactic, but no matter how hard you try to make ice cream sound healthy, it's just not.....believe me, I've explored this Avenue before.