Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Toddler brain

It has finally happened....my brain is always on toddler mode. Matt was home this weekend so I was having the rare experience of using the bathroom by myself. The bathroom is right next to the living room so I could hear cartoons playing. I started to sing along. I'm 28 years old, using the bathroom by myself, and I catch myself singing along with cartoons from the other room. It's not like it was a good song, I can't even remember which cartoon was playing. The only thing I know is it wasn't Curious George since I hate that monkey and would never sing along to any of his shenanigans.

I also cut up my own dinner in tiny pieces the other day. I'm losing it, or just further proof I should get out more and talk to someone besides an almost 2 year old.

Friday, May 24, 2013

Time out fail

I love my child and this age is fun....sometimes I have to utter this phrase over and over in my head to remind myself. While almost 2 is fun, it is also pushing boundaries and makes me want to pull out all my hair....until Zach decides he likes me again.

With the "pushing boundaries" aka just being awful on purpose, we started time out. We have a small place with limited options so I put a chair on the corner of the kitchen. Turns out sitting in the chair is fun. You can watch tractors out the window and get the dogs to come play with you and see all the pictures on the fridge. Turns out Zach would be put in time out in purpose and just laugh at me, taunting me really, in an evil scary movie sort of way. It was time for a new plan fast since Zach had been in timeout 5 times in 2 hours and I was contemplating day drinking.

Luckily we still have the pack and play handy and he doesn't ever sleep in it, so I figured it'd be ok if he learned to hate it. It was perfect; he couldn't get out, the dogs couldn't get in, and it can be placed in a spot with the least amount of fun things to look at. The number of timeouts per hour dropped significantly and I chalked up a win for team mom....those are few and far between. I'm bringing that timeout with me everywhere. Fear the pack and play little one.

Clearly an ornery one...

Sunday, May 19, 2013

5 years

Friday was Matt & I's 5th wedding anniversary. I don't think I say enough just how awesome he is. I met him 10 years ago at a random college party and my life hasn't been the same since. Over the years we have grown leaps and bounds as a couple. He makes me a better person everyday & I can't imagine life without him. We celebrated out of town without the little man. We got lots of sleep and had lots of laughs and beers.....it was the best anniversary ever. Here's to 65 more, lym.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

We all scream for ice cream!

Did you know Zach likes ice cream? Because I didn't.

Zach and I were driving around after a particularly whiny morning with no nap in sight. I knew I needed something to make it through the day so I swung into McDonalds drive thru. I generally go for the diet fountain pop....fountain pop just tastes better than canned pop....but called in the big guns and went with an ice cream cone. I assumed I was safe since, to my knowledge, Zach has never seen an ice cream cone. I figured he'd just ignore me and keep demanding I take him to a tractor now.

I get the cone and on my first lick I hear from the back seat clear as day "ice cream, ice cream". I stop amazed and asked "what?!". Sure enough, like a battle cry from the backseat "ice cream please, ice cream please mommy!!!!". I guess he learned somewhere along the way what an ice cream come is.....ahem nana...and I will forever have to sneak ice cream if I want it without toddler slobber in it.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Mothers day hang over

My weekend was amazing. On Friday I received some awesome mothers day cards in the mail from my mother in law and sister in law. That night my sister came into town. Saturday we had a graduation party for my other sister in law, which ended in a family wide flip cup game. And Sunday I was a big lazy bum. I cuddled with Zach and let Matt take care of me, it was awesome.

After such an amazing weekend, Monday felt like a mothers day hangover (not a real one, I worked through that on Saturday...I can't hang like I used to and flip cup is a young mans game). I was back to reality making breakfast and changing diapers. I actually said out loud, while washing dishes since we're practically Amish and don't have a dishwasher, "it's not mothers day anymore". Granted this was after working all day and making the dinner that produced all the dirty dishes so I was feeling a little surly, but nonetheless, I missed mothers day.

I'm already counting down the days until next year. My goal is to somehow be more lazy than I was this year. I also pray and beg Zach doesn't only watch his tractor video. We watched that ridiculousness 3 times. I now sing made up tractor songs all day...still totally worth it to snuggle up with my squirmy toddler.

And any mothers day post would be remiss without telling the world how amazing my mom is. She helps me grow each day and I treasure her more than words can say. She's also beautiful...I mean we look just alike so it's not surprising, but I still hope I can grow up and be just like her. And she beat my brother in flip cup, a woman of many talents I tell ya.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Terrible does not begin to describe 2

Oh the terrible twos...we are not friends. I thought we entered the terrible twos before since Zach would get whiney, but I was oh so wrong. The terrible twos are like contractions...you don't know any better, so when you have a little taste of the real thing you're like here it is! Then the real thing happens and you're like oh hell that thing I thought was bad is child's play compared to this.

Today Zach had a tantrum because I only gave him half of a cookie. I thought I was being Mother Teresa giving him half a cookie and not an apple, but apparently I was the wicked witch if the west. Earlier in the day he threw himself on the ground because he had to wear socks with his shoes. He often freaks out when the puppy touches him. This would be understandable if it didn't happen 20 seconds after Zach pet the puppy and tried to feed her his very offensive cookie.

I hear 3 is worse than 2. This is why God made toddlers so cute with their little features and 'mommy pwease'. Friends of ours came over and witnessed a tantrum and were very concerned. They asked what was wrong and we had to break it to them it was no disease, he was just almost 2. Those big smiles, giggles and new words daily help me forget Zach's alter ego, which is apparently a soap opera drama king's evil twin...as dramatic as they come.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Future farmer

We've started planning for the future here at the farm. You can never start them too young....

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Manly man

Sunday morning and Zach is eating bacon and looking at tractors while sitting in his diaper....he is pretty much having the most manly morning ever. Have a good weekend!

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Doing it all

Today I was kicking butt. I was doing it all and feeling good. I had Zach working at the farm with me, I had dishes and laundry done early, worked on my quilt, and was ready to play outside before making my family dinner. This lasted briefly. If I had to pinpoint where it went wrong I would say it was about the time the turd fell on the floor. Yup. At least it was Zach's and not mine or the dogs. I'm not sure how that makes it better, but it's oddly comforting that at least I still have control of my bodily functions if nothing else. A tantrum of epic proportions (again Zach) followed and that homemade dinner never happened.

My aunt posted on Facebook how I do it all....work, run, kid, etc. it was a wonderful compliment but I had to let her in on our secret. Our secret is its chaos here. I hate cooking and have way too much of a smart mouth to ever be on any type of reality show and not embarrass myself. Somedays I do feel like I kicked butt and other days I drop turds on the floor. We laugh everyday and survive like everyone else. My idea of doing it all is to finish the day laughing with my husband without any poo on the ground or on me...some say low standards, I say setting yourself up for success.